hi welcome to chili's

well. decided to jump on the journal train bc why not! loosely keeping track of goals and mostly just rambling here. bc i love to talk but im also shy <3 about me - my name is kou, im 27. medium, bi, and ready to try. 12/12 is my birthday! im a sagittarius sun, capricorn moon, and gemini rising <3 whoever made me picked chaos. i live in the desert southwest! i know no peace! i work full time but i work from home which is why im always around so often c: interests - • POKEMON!!!! • kirby • animal crossing • splatoon • anything nintendo tbh • genshin impact <3 zhongli/xiao main. eternally losing 50/50 <3 • writing/roleplaying! idk if anyone here knows me from the pokemon tumblr rpc but if you do. hi <3 not going to make this look super fancy just bc i dont have the mental fortitude :3

goals - • wishalloy on all my badges ^-^ probably going to choose to suffer some more and hunt more summon items once i get 500 helix orbs bc i cant never quit. maybe clear bells or nightmare shrouds next!

tr trophies/keepsakes -

god looking at the griseous orb progress is hurting my soul a little bit <3 who decided for me that i would try to get 1500 orbs?? the things i do for my fave. my queen. giratina my beloved baby you have done nothing wrong in your life ever. regardless i think i will try to hunt a few other legendaries that i write just bc they are my babies. giratina and deoxys really are just the start. perhaps ill hunt some of my friend's legendary muses too. oough im gonna make goals SO INFURIATING FOR MYSELF <3

me: omg i love genshin!! <33 also me: has not even booted up the game in the past month depression give me back my hobbies and hyperfixations challenge. i played a bit of the golden archipelago update but then stopped 🥺 and now sumeru is looming. oooguhu i need to do the event w diluc too i even shelled out the money for his costume but what's the point when i dont have wgs 😭 goofy yellowish orange unforged w the red and black is NOT the move out here even if i do run zhongli on my team. the AESTHETIC </3

i wanna try to sell some of the s/a ss cleffas ive hatched but i dont even know where to begin pricing s/a exclusives u_u like ik people generally use the dp value but.... is it different for exclusives or do ppl just not care u_u huooooo im hoping i can hatch another melan just for fun at least too but we'll see! ill keep going until im out of dcp. then probably will full commit to finishing my badges

getting closer to my helix orb goal wuh.... maybe once i get paid ill nab some more zc and start collecting clear bells or smth.... we'll see how far i get on my helix goal by then! and im almost a third of the way to my gris orb goal?? never thought i would wind up collecting these summons so fast 🥺

the price of griseous orbs is so high now.... despair. i dont think ive ever seen them at like, over 80zc like that omg. here's hoping ppl honor my 60zc collector price 🥺👉👈.... i only ever bought them at 300k cr anyways from the market also cant wait for my time off coming up at the beginning of next month, ive been so exhausted lately for some reason? at least im playing genshin again which is nice and finishing up the gaa before sumeru ;-; also desparate to get into cult of the lamb but there's too much going on waaaa

now im almost thinking/am worried i set my griseous orb goal too high ;-; 1500 is a lot to hatch in a single sitting especially since i want to get to wishalloy for my badges also, so a 30k ehp hunt that's over 1000 eggs... i dunno ;-; maybe i should do 500 to start now like with my helix goal, especially since mp is so high now? uuuogho i feel like a quitter tho but. thinking more about it beyond finance wise? like. idk how to explain it. like just in the long run for everything else i want to do? i dont know if 1500 is a good idea :'< ill see how my box openings go tomorrow since i get paid but ahhhh i feel like im letting myself down help 😭

after sleeping on it a bit i think i will lower my goal ;-; feels bad and feels like i failed but that's ok. i think once i actually start the hunt ill feel glad that i did it. also got up this morning and i was so dizzy?? still kind of am :< i think i need to drink more water, i didnt really take good care of myself yesterday so. water time today <3