Single post in Shadvex's Story [PG-13]

Random Brick Joke is Random “Actually, no,” I said, pulling the paper back out. “This thing is a jerk.” I threw the paper somewhere and continued my walk. Chapter 2: Waht Three More Donut-Filled Years Later “Right, right,” I muttered as Zero explained a plan he had. “So what do I do, wait around fo- Oof!” A paper ad rudely interrupted me by hitting me in the face. The spikes on my helmet punctured it. I now had a paper stuck to the back of my head. Because Shadvex Loves his Helmet. It could have been a lot worse- it could have knocked off my helmet, I thought. Invisible Black Holes like Donuts Before I could do that, the donut vanished from my hand into seemingly another dimension. “...What,” I said. ((me and z-flame tend to have our characters randomly join in conversations, one of mine stole the donut)) No Idea “Where the crud is it…?” I muttered. Despite having followed the map, I couldn’t find my destination. “Is there mud here? Walking is starting to get hard.” I looked up and found a wall. “Oh.” Vile is in a Pickle- Literally I am so screwed, I thought. So, so very screwed. Suddenly, the other reploid turned into a pickle. “...What the actual fudge,” I said. Do Pickle-Flavored Donuts Exist? Then suddenly the table in the room turned into a pile of pickles. As did the chairs. The Big, Fat, Filpin’ End. It turns out that was a bad idea, because the Maverick Army Base burned to the ground that very day. There Goes the Last Fraction of Logic in This FF “Also, we sent you from an alternate universe to be your roommate. Have fun with that.” “...You what?” I asked. Blaze Heatnix What did you Do After failing, I proceeded to die a slow horrible painful death. Don’t ask how I lived to tell this story. ((I don’t even know anymore)) And This is Why we Should all get our Knives from Shadvex At this point I just decided to take a knife out of the box and go on a frenzy. And then everyone died. The end. At This Point There Should be a Company That Fixes Broken Fourth Walls He grinned. Slightly. I don’t know how that works either. Don’t question it, and you might retain whatever shred of sanity you have left. Depending on who’s reading this. Wait, that breaks the fourth wall, doesn’t it? Eh, I don’t really care. Yes, I just pulled a Blaze Heatnix. Anyways. Back to the story. In case anyone’s still reading, which I highly doubt. Is This Becoming EoNiP? Cinder where did this Homestuck reference come from, I thought. Yes I realize I’m breaking the fourth wall but who cares? Suddenly a random Yveltal appeared. “IT WAS A HOMESTUCK SONG REFERENCE THERE’S A DIFFERENCE,” it shouted. Then it disappeared. And then suddenly a random reploid/phoenix/assassin/ninja thing with a toaster attached to its back appeared out of nowhere. “And stop breaking the fourth wall, we’re tired of fixing it even though you’ve only done it twice,” he said before vanishing. “...What just happened,” I asked. “Obviously the story’s being taken over by the SPIRIT OF OBSIDIAN,” a random Absol randomly said, randomly. “It’s only illogical.” ((ObsidianBlack555 was the temporary editor for some time. Yes, I just said temporary editor for some time.)) What Happen “...Do either of the authors have any idea on what they’re doing anymore?” asked Storm Eagle. “Probably not,” I said. “Probably not.” An Yveltal appeared. “Stop breaking the fourth wall, we’re running out of super glue!” Then she disappeared. “Wait, super glue? You don’t put walls together with super glue…” Storm Eagle said. “Don’t worry, they’ve done that before.” I said. vile ste us up the bmob I tried to make a run for it, but I was far too late. The last thing I remember before I died a slow horrible death was the sound of Vile’s cold, insane laughter. ((do i look like i have any idea what i’m doing i don’t)) well okay And then suddenly Vile exploded. I sighed. “Z-Flame, when are you going to focus on writing the actual story and not stuff that goes into the insanity section?” Like every other time, the random reploid with the toaster turtle shell thingy teleported into the room. “Be quiet, you,” it said. “Writing takes effort, why can’t we have our fun?” The End I gave a growl of frustration and randomly exploded. The end. ...That’s it, folks. There’s nothing else to see here. The main character’s dead. Go do something else. It’s not like an epilogue or some kind of explanation will appear out of nowhere if you stare at the screen long enough. He Needs to Stop Breaking the Fourth Wall Clearly the authors weren’t going to let me kill one of the original eight. “Stop breaking the fourth wall!” the random Yveltal shouted. “The day I find you,” I snarled, “Is the day you- mrpH!” Out of nowhere, the random phoenix-assassin-toaster thing came and shoved a donut in my mouth. “Now go to bed and think about what you’ve done,” he said before teleporting away. Because Logic A very panicky looking ...Z-Flame are you paying any attention right now “Go to bed, you.” I guess not. I’ll just sit here suspended in mid-air not even knowing who it is I’m supposed to be killing. More Logic and ran into and ran into Guys what are you doing “Shut up, I’m trying to watch stuff on YouTube and it’s hard enough without you breathing down my neck.” Remind me again why we had to have Z-Flame in charge “Go to bed, you.” Logic Still not content with the amount of dead torsos, I continued running down the corridor and ran into… Ran into… Holy Altair… A random reploid. Oh. They died. And so did everyone else. Blaze Heatnix is a sneaky crud Next thing I knew, Blaze Heatnix had stolen my helmet and my pants were on fire. I warned them about stares. I told them, guys. And they DIDN’T LISTEN. “My point still stands, Boomer Kuwanger,” growled Vile, “I told you to stay outside.” “What are you going to do about it, put me in the time-out corner?” retorted Boomer Kuwanger. They proceeded to have an intense staredown, and everyone exploded. Yes, that is my head that just landed on your doormat. No, the crystal on my helmet isn’t extremely valuable. velguarder what are you doing “WEEHHHH!” I yelped, trying to shake it off. “SIGMA, CALL OFF YOUR BEAST DEMON CAT DOG!” “Velugarder, GET DOWN!” yelled Sigma. The wolf jumped off of my leg and proceeded to have a mid-air seizure. Sigma facepalmed. “No, you stupid wolf, not that kind of get down. What do you think you are, a 20XX YouTube dweller?” “Sigma, I don’t think letting your pet go on the internet is a good idea…” I said. Sigma sighed. “He must be going online while I’m asleep, he’s practically a ninja.” “...Ninja cat?” I said. STORM EAGLE WHAT HAVE YOU DONE YOU KILLED THE MAIN CHARACTER “Not so fast, you two don’t seem to be blue hedgehogs,” said an eerily familiar voice behind us. I turned around and promptly had a processor crash. And died. “I’m no- Oh crud, call the repair guy,” Blaze Catnip said. “Wait, Blaze Catnip?” wel One of the spikes on my helmet poked through it. The door promptly exploded. “I didn’t know doors followed Mega Man X physics,” said Storm Eagle. “We’re in Post X7 right now, shut up before the toaster finds us,” said Blaze Heatnix. There was suddenly a waffle eating pie sitting on all three of us. “Too late,” muttered Storm Eagle.