Single post in PSA: Escaped Pokémon!

Ravyne: "I am verymuch adorable." Constantine: [facepalms] "That's not - Ravyne, they can't even see you." Ravyne: "...CONNIE! FIND ME SITTYBOX." Constantine: "..." [lifts Ravyne by the streamers] Ravyne: "THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT! If you weren't makestrong against me I would...." Constantine: [coughs and gently shakes] "Get on with the news broadcast?" Ravyne: "FINE I WILL DO! Two week ago under mostbeauty blood eclipse mystery Pokémon makeflee dumbstupid scientists and it wellhide." Constantine: "Remind me why we made him the reporter when no one can understand him?" Ravyne: [raises voice] "I REPEATSAYING. TWO WEEK AGO. POKEMON ESCAPEYDEALS. CANNOT SEARCHYFINDS. BITEEAT BERRIES. OTHER FARMER SEE. ARE YOU OWNERHAVER OF DEAFEARS?" [shuffles papers] Ravyne: "Could be muchworse. Could be biteeat Pokémon. BE GLAD IT ONLYEAT TASTYBERRIES." Constantine: [facepalms again] "And I think that's our cue to switch to our nose on the ground, Sei!" Ravyne: "SEI! HAVE YOU FOUND MISSING POKÉMON!" Sei: "... H-... Oh-...Ugh, I think this thing is broken.. You guys able to hear me? Bah.. Anyway.. We've not exactly uh... found it yet, but me an' the guys have found a helluva lotta tracks.. Judgin' by this things tracks, it's been all around the entire farm! Ravyne: "WHY HAVEN'T YOU FOUNDSEEN IT YET?! Is nose broken? Does need to spray grosswater up nose and makesneeze?" Sei: "Uhm, Excuse. Listen here you lil' star. Me an' my team of sniffers are just fi--" [bwarfs in surprise] Ravyne: "SEI WHAT HAPPENED?" Sei: "I swear to Arceus somethin' just ran behind us! Tripped over Ledah an' then jus' bolted off... Most ... towards another Berry field. I dunno if ... the escaped 'mon, or some farmer's ... got loose, but.. THE POINT IS... ELTA, ... I HAVE LITTLE LEGS AND I--" [dead air] Ravyne: "Sei? Sei, speakanswer me! No...the berries were nothing but a smokescreen! I heard bwarfing, then...it played us like a damn fiddle!" [sound of cursing] Ledah: "That thing's dead when I find it, hear me? Dead! No, actually, I'll let it live, but only to make it regret that it was ever born!" Ravyne: "_{Oh, they're alive...} Punishbeat it later! Did you seespot it? WHAT DID IT LOOK LIKE. _{Was it cute?}" Ledah: "No, stupid, it was behind me and I don't have eyes in the back of my head! Do you have any idea how much it hurts, getting tripped over by something twice your size? Do you?" Ravyne: "Don'tcare. If you don't want to be tripped on, don't look like leafbush. Simple." Ledah: "I AM NOT A BUSH, YOU LITTLE-" Constantine: [switches feeds] "Aaand now it's time for the weather..."