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Entry #2

Mar. 31, 2015
I hate them, I love them. Despise and adore them. The good, the bad, the calm and the mayhem. They break me, they heal me. Uncover and protect me. Disheartening, encouraging, the person I want to be.
My parents are off to the Philippines for three weeks while my brothers and I stay at home. We've never been alone for so long before, so it kinda scares and excites me at the same time. It's a good eight hours since they departed with my car, to leave it in Germany for when they return. Before they left, I felt a little annoyed that they'd chosen to take my car. Hell, I don't have my driver's permit yet and I was feeling disgruntled. Now all I can think is "I hope they land safely". My dad works offshore. Six weeks back and forth from home to work. While I never stop missing him when he's away, that feeling's suppressed because I have mom, my brothers and my dog to keep me company. Mom drives me up a tree most of the time, but she has her fabu-moments. It's 1 AM. My brothers and my dog have long gone to bed. The silence is deafening and so I'm playing some music to keep the melancholy away. It doesn't prevent me from reminiscing, or hoping my parents are at least enjoying themselves on their travel. ...And here I was, thinking I could live on my own as soon as I had enough money to move out. Right. I'll keep that thought tucked away for another year or two. Or until my parents come back and the fights start. Ah, 'tis a bittersweet cycle.
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